Them stare. So Judgemental. Clear obvious.
Cynically Profound. Deliberately disgusted.
Them eyes. Black color, roundish oval.
From hair to toes. Observant? Pfuit!
You see, I learnt that some things are rigidly black and white.
Just like walking on shreads of broken glasses.
The pain's instantly aching...
but you won't go back (u cant!).
Cos you've stepped on once and the word quitter's never on agenda!
It's the episode of heartaching not heartbreaking..
As Anna "the OC" said.. "Confident (cohen), Confident!"
===
It ain't about love.
It's about what the heart desires. And it currently aching, deep.
Missing something not someone.
It's a different kinda love. Yet the same warm fuzzy feeling persist.
Crudely say, Hating'em who have judgementally abused me!
A day which I asked for a solitude haven..
And the crowd would whisper,
This is the real world, dear.
It sucks but you're gonna love it!
'til THE magic beans appear and you wouldn't understand why.
Disuatu malam...
ha ha back to cyber world!
been a while eh. I don't miss much tho. well in terms of blogging and curhatan-curhati beginian. I'm literally numb and blank-faced (is it a word?). Come to think of it, been living 3 weeks doing absolutely nothing really is bore the farkin' mind, is it not? DANG there'll be another 2-3 months to go and I feel very dull already. I feel extremely dumb and dull. whatta life eh?!
hokay nevamind that. Update of these past 3 weeks. That, I called.. the dullness of our lives. (DOOL - my version :P)
letsee... my goal for this hols is to always do something new and apparently I've done some new things that I hadn't yet done in the past. Theyre not new to the world, no, but theyre new for me. I'm trying to reconcile things with some household troubles.. it's still work in progress. I also do some sport activities (hurrah! finnaly), I try to do aerobics every day 'xcept weekends and planning on getting treadmill at home (hoho more expenses!). This past 3 weeks, I don't quite fancy malls as I used to.. Whenever I went to malls, it has to be for lunch/dinner, movies, or get some sport activity inside malls (e.g bowling).. it's actually quite fun, realy.. compared to just wandering round, window shopping which usually end-up over-expense shopping! Honestly, I'm gettin' bored with what the city can give to me. I need new things!
Other things, InsyaAllah in 2 weeks I start the internship that Dad has 'helped' us in getting it. Not proud, but not ashamed as well. There ought to be a stepping stone at one point, is it not? The thing is, I'm quite worry about the job. It's completely different with all my degrees. I don't even have the slighest idea on what the dude said during interview. If you can call it an interview that is! Thankfully, the job only took a short period of time. Yet I'm tremendously worried about it. Hey, it ain't me if not worrying about every tiny 'lil thing in this farkin' life. Hopefully though, I can get through it well and finally earn the experience I desperately wanted.
Ya know what, I miss Melbourne!!!!!!!! not entirely though. there are bits and pieces that I dearly misses about that city. But I also don't wanna leave this city as yet. I met old friends. I hung out with the best chicas in town. I did new things that are actually fun!
the drawback? I have limited space. no no i'm still okay with it. The space, I mean. But I'm used to being 'whatever I want and wishes all day, all the time'. Now, I have to consider for others. Ah no one knows what I mean anyways. I just need to adapt. Yeah, thats what I always have to do. Adapt and adjust anywhere, everywhere.
I can't sleep. Prolly due to the intern thing. It's 10 days from now and it's like a ticking bomb. Maybe I worry to nuch cos of the pressure of dad's help for the job? More so, these are his colleagues. Damn if I'm not quick and adjust well, not only I'd be embarassed but also dad? See, pressure pressure. that's why I slightly disapprove this kinda family engagement in any of job hunting zone. But without any family engagement, it'd be a hella needle in the hays situation for finding an internship for short period of time in respectable company. Arggh I just hope I'd stop worrying and just have some positive thinking that I'm capable to do the job!
sigh... I wish I'm that optimistic!
O ya, I'm lovin Doc. Jack from LOST. Yes, A new hot doc in town, baby!! unfortunately, the tv series suck!! it ain't what I expected to be, the ending I mean. I regret not sleeping all night long just to finish one whole season and not getting any satisfaction afterwards.
another good-lookin' dude in town is a local boy. why I said boy, cos he is a just a BOY! he played some dude in a movie entitled Alexandria. He has a twin, but still he's the cute one. But theyre all so childish lookin'. So boyish okay. But cute lookin anyway. good enough. :) all i know that theyre names are marcel and mischa. Mind you, not mischa barton. This mischa is a dude! but thats not who i'm likin'. His brother, marcel, is the good lookin one. Both very boyish though.
alrighty lah. I'm outta here.
wish me luck on the intern thing. :(
Offline for approx 3 months. Wheeee!!
'Cause I'm leaving on a jet plane
I don't know when I'll be back again
Oh, babe, I hate to go
Not entirely true, bags are not yet packed properly. Still have some things to buy tomoz and jammed all 'em into the bag. hopefully theyll fit. I hate packing. I hate calling taxi at night. I hate the rush, the anxiety, the worries. I hate to always go back and forth here and there. I hate flying, I hate travelling, I hate the fact that I have to sit for long hours just to get to destination. I hate that I have to hate these.
I've never leave town for more than a month and a half. Deep down I guess I'm quite nervous and 'lil bit terrified. I guess I just worried too much. It should be great, shudnt it? Maybe just don't think too much. Hookay.
I just cleared up all the food storage inside the house. All of em.. gone! if not in you go trash, in you go giveaway bags. Cos all electricities, gas, water, phones, etc will be off for the next 3 months. Thus I need to clean up everything so that when I get back, there'll be no rust or fungus all over my house. I can't understand why I'm dead sleepy these past two days. I'm always sleepy at this hour, which is very bizarre since I don't have any assignments or uni stuff to worried about. Usually I only feel dead sleepy when I'm studying, but hellooo... I'm not! what the hell?!
Gotta go. The massive house cleaning is not yet ended. blargh.
but starting 2 days from now...
I'm gonna be on holiday.. Wheeeeeeeee!!! Hiatus mode is ON baby!!!
Maunday, Tuesday, Wednesday
Tuesday 15 november 2005.. I'll be leaving. To a place that I don't know what I'm gonna be or what could I do. It's not foreign but sometimes it feels strange. I get the feeling, it'll be good this year.. but I dont know. What if... things happen? I always have plans on getting things straight, each and every hols I went through. But nothing is changing.. I'm too chicken shit to even spoke out ma mind. Honestly, I'm terrified. Hopefully, I can do better this hols and things just out in the open. Andd... out the bitches they go! hurrah!
I'm gonna miss having a speedy Internet connection when I get there. Internet is... almost a luxury item there. It's not something as 'cool' as having the latest gadgety mobile phones. Dunno which is more important in life, mobile phones or Internet? Maybe neither? That's an option too.. For no geeks. LoL I've been spending almost 24/7 online than offline. My life pretty much living on the cyber space. Not exactly socializing either but too caught up with ma own mischieves. Life's pretty much dull when you live it like this, you know. That's why I'm leaving. Leaving to have some solitude and restless tension with all the 'dullness' of life. Enter, dramas and raggety tragedy. So very days of our lives!
I don't think I'll miss much of the cyber space. I had enough of staring at monitor for hours and hours til my eyes sore. I think I'll catch on other monitors, i.e. TV! Ha! same diff! I will have my holiday and I will relax, chill and having fun day and night. I'm too much of a bitch to even give a god damn crap about anything else. I will only caught up with dramas when they only appear on Mr. TiVo. I ain't gonna give a rat's ass about real dramas. Theyre bitches and I kill bitches. I'm scary when necessary. (hey it rhymes! *idiot!*)
Okay Okay so youre a bitch. We know, you know, everyone knows ( i guess). what now?
Now, I'm gonna off to bed and tomoz if I have time I'll post about two movies I watched yesterday and today, flight plan and corpse bride. heads up: both suck fest 2005!! So dissapointed with Johnny Depp. Whats with you Johnny!!
Im beat. Off now. Ciao bella.
Choke me! Demon has come knocking on heaven's door.
my GOD! only idiots who wud wanna read all these regulation and condition terms!! sadly, I'm that idiot! Blargh (in my defense, i'm an idiot by pressure.)
I mean they were made just to be made, not to be read! theyre useful to just-in-case situation. but bloody hell it's too much!!!
"a friend in need is a friend indeed. a friend with weed is better."
Ha! gak nyambung. mampus.
yoU.K
Oh I miss youu..
You whose name I prefer not to recall.
You whom I foolishly bashed since that day you said 'hello'.
You faraway yoU.K You!
You! A thousand times You.
Pride, Pride, Pride.
Apologize is never enough. But I AM sorry.
have the very best life, You.
I miss You so. Do You know?
Where are You? Where have You gone?
Foolish me. I did not feel the love. You.
Dearest.. You.
Miss You..
I know I've stayed in Aussie for quite long time, 4 years is reasonable amount of time to miss all's that familiar to you. It never hit me this hard that I'd miss everything back home. Yes, I've lived for quite a while away from Indo and still cant call this place 'home'. Instead, every holiday I kept asking myself, "will I buy a ticket home?". Gak pernah nyangka kalo gue bakalan kangen semuanya, dari baik sampe nistanya keadaan Indo gue.. terlebih lagi di bulan ini. Di bulan Ramadhan gue gak ngerasa seperti ngalamin bulan Ramadhan. Gue terlalu caught up ama kehidupan duniawi gue. Yeah apalagi kalo bukan kuliah" biadab itu. I've tried to hid it, even to deny it. tapi yah.. denial denial denial terus. Capek.
Tabuh berbunyi gemparkan alam sunyi
Berkumandang suara adzan
Mendayu memecah sepi
Selang seli sahutan ayam
Know the lyric? It's nasyid by Raihan. Amazing huh that I'm listening Raihan. Dengerin Raihan gue langsung keinget smua kegiatan" Ramadhan di Indo. Dari keramaian Subuh sampe Maghrib. Dari acara" sinetron yang Oh-So-Lame sampai acara ceramah" Rohani di waktu Subuh & menjelang Maghrib. Keramaian Ramadhan yang dimana gak hanya segelintir orang tapi semuanya menjalani ibadah puasa yang bikin suasananya ngena banget. Ah, gue aja kali yang lagi melloww.. ato gue sebenernya udah muak ama this oh-so-boring city? Mbuh lah.
Kayaknya sih gue lagi ngalamin apa yang Joey alamin. Everyone's moving on dan gue disini nge-deny everything that goes forward. Kalo gue pengecut, gue bakalan lari (lagi). Kalo gue udah dewasa dan wiser, gue bakalan cope and moving on juga. I'll need every strength I can get to pursue the latter. Bismillahirrohmanirrohim.
1/4 Undone
Is it presumptious of me to feel relieved at this point?
I have done approx 7700 words in about one week (?!), pretty much strained eyes but surprisingly more than enough sleep hours(!). Ah, the wonderful life of uni student. Nothing to compare.
Today's update: I bought $3.50 folder and 50c stamp for my assignment. Well, there is a rule that if you want the final assignments to be handed back, students must provide envelope and stamp. The $3 folder was just addition since I submit late so the folder is to "bribe" for extra marks (hehe kali aja for presentation dapet more marks =p). Stupid me, I bought all of those, but when I popped the bloody papers in the submission box, I totally forgot to put the stamp on the envelope. Garrgg.. not only now I don't get to see the mark and feedback from the lecturer, but I also don't get the $3.50 folder back! Dammit. * i know i'm stingy, so shush!*
Theres only 1 more assignment, 2500 words about sales strategy. Garsh I tot this one wud be my life saver, but NOooo! John had to give us the unthinkable! Je deviens fou !! Okay, the assignment is about developing sales strategy for swinburne university with target market Indonesian students. I have to assess swinburne internal sales operations, Indonesian purchase behavior analysis, and one competitor analysis ( I think I'll choose Monash cos theres a friend used to work there, hopefully she'll help *fingers cross*).
Oh well, I shud start research like, right now(?) but hey, ngeblog ampe goblog dulu aja gituh! =D
Off the topic, I (again) have the craze about ... yes ... none other than ... the fleshy sin city full of rich kiddies with their hunky dudes and stringy G's chicas ... the orange county. Californiaaaa.. here we come LoL Cannot help it okay. I know that TV series is sooo lame but I found it amusing. I love seth's sarcasm. I love the laid-back environment (i mean the beach, the sun, the fashion, the clothes *or lack thereof*
I cannot wait for the third season to premier. It already started in the US and they now airing until episode 5. Im bit worried that it'll air in Aussie this summer. Aarrgghh Nooo! I wont be here during summer. =( So curious about whatll happen to marissa after she shot trey.
Hey do u notice that all casts are mostly.. err, old. I mean, older than the characters theyre playing in OC. They just dont go for 16!! I mean, theyre 20ish something (and alot more something okay!). Mischa barton is the youngest one and shes not even 16 y.o! Oh well theyre only teen idol once. No need to fuss on how old they really are.
Okay2. better start research. Im off.
hip hip hurrahh!
Popular searches in my network:
Popular searches in my network (Friendster):
1. tubuh mulus
2. rekaman pemerkosaan
3. kuremas
4. tanpa BH
5. free mp3 download
6. anjasmara
7. ipod
8. ngintip kamar ganti
9. ramalan jodoh
10. schoolarship
Ya Tuhan.
Analisa 1: kuremas.. cookie dough, cucian baju, what? and tubuh mulus? Helloo... cari manekin. Mulus bgt tuh, dijamin.
Analisa 2: rekaman pemerkosaan? Sakit. Why not search nude sex or hardcore or whatever xxx. Not that those keywords are disgusting enuff, but if I may say, dude youre a potential psychopat who deserved to be in jail.
Analisa 3: The words tanpa BH is hillarious, why not just say naked or topless. Oops sorry, no no english no no understand ya? Yang keren donk klo mo kinky. Ndeso.
Analisa 4: I think I kinda know why anjasmara is on the list as well. Prolly cos he's lately been exposed of posing nude for an art work. Maybe there are loads people who are curious about it (the art work) or merely horny on anjas's - unleashed and exposed - flesh skin. Hey, he is yummy, NOT! vomit.
Analisa 5: teori pervert network gue terbukti benar.
Sick bastards.
On stuff.
Charity.
I hate that word. It obviously dictates the difference between the haves and have-nots. You said charity, you hear the Ritz: all black attire. Wine glasses clinks, faux laughters, and oh-have-you-seen-my-enormous-jewels extravaganza. That's charity.
This doesnt count for everyone, I know that. I realised that. I do.
Then again, can't we just omit the word charity? It really is insignificant word to be included in any occasion, really.
I said it to myself last night.. you know what, it didn't sound right. At that moment, I felt like a do-gooders snob. Hating it. Can't we just do something good without havin' everyone else highly praise on us? Like Agent Jay on MIIB said, "Have you ever heard James Edwards? He saved the lives of people on the subway tonight. No one knows he exists".
Social conscience dont always have to be visible. It's more likely valuable when invisible. Maybe I'm naive, Maybe I'm ignorant. Maybe I'm just a stoopid girl.
Oh well.
ps: I can't concentrate. I have a disturbing thought that I have a tumor or virus whatever inside my brain which failed me to focus on what I have read. HA! Idiotic. *Astaghfirullah Jangan sampe deh, kebanyakan nonton House gini deh! :( *
BODOH IDIOT GOBLOG!!
ini hasilnya kalo males. Ini hasilnya ngerjain dalam sehari dan gak ada persiapan. INI hasilnya menjadi seorang pemalas!! INI yang LO MAU?? BODOH!
Satu2nya safety net yang alhasil bubar jalan jadi hal terburuk yang LO terima. IDIOT.
Dan selama ini elo slalu merasa elo PINTAR? HA! Think again.
Mau dapet 80% ?? USAHA 90% !!! GOBLOG. Kayak gini sok pinter. NGACA DULU!
Sekarang udah tau kenyataan kan? Mata Lo udah Kebuka? Good.
Dalam 2 minggu elo HARUS kerja rodi. Gak ada kata malas!!
Elo harus AIM high. Elo HARUS:
- MDT - 1/ C or D ... 2/D :: 3 days 27 Oct - 30 Oct
- PM - 1/ D ... 2/ D ... 3/ HD :: 4 days 31 Oct - 3 Nov
- SM - 1/ C ... 2/ HD :: 7 days 4 Nov - 11 Nov
NOW STOP ANGRY AND DO SOMETHING!!!!
Hey Jealousy!
Hey Jealousy!
Spinsters in a couples universe. Everything duplicates. It feels diff. Smiles and laughter are all that appear, yet a mask was worn. It was then who smiled and laughed. Inside, no one knows that all's broken.. Torn to pieces.
Sometimes huge gathering is necessary. Yet sometimes we just wanna run quickly as we just open the door.
Let the magic begin
I can't help it okay. When I'm not rushed with deadlines I have nothing else to do hence I write. Mostly about anything with no particular importance, really. It's 10.38 PM now and at this hour I shud be doin my final reports and essays. You know what, screw em! I'm so sick of assignments. Oh FYI, I made another Gmail address *tee hee*. It's called noixe.nocturno. I have no idea how that name came up. It just came up and don't ask what it meant. Cos it's meaningless, seriously. I made that email cos the fact that I joined several mailing lists and I forward them all to my 'formal' email address. It's quite disturbing to know that all people in mailing list will know my full name. Dont you think your full name used only for your own privacy? or is it just me that so paranoid? Oh well. I like discreet name better so no fuss.
Info Info Info!!
I watched this Australian Talkshow called 'the Glass House'. But I think the form of 'talkshow' don't really suit the show well. It's like stand-up comedy, compilation! The all 3 hosts are stand-up comedians (or they used to be) and/or radio DJ. Theyre very loud but also can crack up your lungs, hard! I like the middle guy, wil anderson. He's ridiculously hillarious. Check his page out. And Oh he's sooo cute. *HaHa Yes I AM a girly girl!* Glass house is fuckin' hillarious yet mind-blowing information come screamin' at ya from very different perspective. You get comedy and also world news, in one package! It's another way to stimulate your brain now eh! I think it'll be another one of my fave TV shows. Currently on the list: House, Rove Live, Grey's anatomy, Numb3rs.
Speaking of Harry Potter movie, it's the fourth (or fifth?) entitled 'Goblet of fire'. Heck I can't even remember what the story is about. I do think the movies will never become huge hit when compared with the books. You kinda lost the enthusiasm and excitement after knowing all the mysteries from the book and suddenly you have them visualized in different manner than of your imaginations. Sometimes it can be a bit turn off, don't you think? at least I do believe so.
Off the topic, there's a new movie: Elizabethtown, starring orlando bloom and kirsten dunst. I thought it's a typical sweet-chick-flick thing. At first, hmm.. interesting. Then I read the review on its official website.. can I just say, Suck-fest 2005!! The movie is very shallow and what's interesting I ask you? I suppose, none. Who made this movie anyway?!?! I can't believe Orlando (well, he'll do any movie I assumed?) and Kirsten would do a movie as such?! It's revolting! Hm I shudnt say that now shud I? I havent actually watch the movie nor the trailer. I might get interested and Kualat Kualatt for ending-up liking the movie. It could so happen I tell ya! Oh well.
Another update.. I love James Blunt's Tears and Rain. I still can't figure out what the song is about though. Uhh.. it's 11.26PM now. I shudve finished reading an article bout brand loyalty, but I hate the subject too much I don't even wanna bother doing the assignment. I cannot Not do the essay now can I? It's worth half of the semester work (55%!!). Geesh I donno whatta hell in convenor's mind when he allocated the tasks for this sub. I mean, c'mon 55 for one lousy essay?? That's madness!! Yet I have to surpass this madness. Garrghh.
Ah this the end of it. I'm just bored and need to write about 'Glass House' (and Mr. Potter himself of course).
Hokay. I'm outta here.
Goodnight dear nightingales...
The Ipod Empire
Question: How many iPod owned in a single household?
It is amazing how iPod can continuously releasing new innovation in just matter of weeks. Nano was just another invention and now we see there's already a new one called 'the new iPod'. The difference between this one and the others is the addition of video feature. Its so cool OK. I so desperately want one.
iPod is using massive advertisement exposure, which implicitly force people to have the necessity to at least have one iPod in their pocket. They create the need for customers. Subconsciously, they brainwashed us to have iPod like having the need to eat. This hype is more fab than the booming of mobile phones. It is massive! In mere months you saw people wander around city, suburbs, small villages with the white string earphones hanging on their neck.
I always wonder what makes iPod so different than any other mp3 players? The first iPod was not new-to-the-world product. There are good amount manufacturers who have established mp3 players ranging from affordable to ridiculously overpriced. So what makes iPod a cool-gadget-that-everyone-must-own?
It certainly has a huge capacity. Helloo.. 20 to 40 GB? That's HUGE. It could hold thousands of music and documents. But do we have time to listen all of the tenth thousands songs? Logically, no. But of course, we are tempted with the idea of having all things fit into one small packaging. It's basically our electronic junkyard, really. Look, I'm not saying iPod is useless innovation. Heck I even want one, rememberr..!
But the thing is, I'm really curious on behind-the-screen of iPod production. I really really really want to know how they actually market the product. Cos the success definitely came mostly from the marketing/advertising division. They did a hella job! I want to know the brain behind all the mass marketing planning of each and every iPod products. Just look at the ads, they are everywhere and always consistent with its' contents and preferences. Those what made us brainwashed so easily. Look at the eye-catching colors and silhouettes of party-goers with their iPods. It's way cool OK. It got attitude. I'm lovin' their ads. Now they even have Eminem in one of the ad, with the same consistencies. It is awesome!
I know I don't need another iPod cos sis already have one, the iPod photo. But you know what, I still can't help that I'm craving the new one with video feature. It's bloody expensive though. That's why I'm having second (and maybe third, fourth, etc) thoughts. But it is just so practical. I can watch a movie and listen to my music collection just in one player? I want onee!!!!!
Friendster is a Sicko Perv!
Seriously. I'm beginning not liking Friendster now. You know, that cyber-social-networking-that-is-so-gaul. They added many (i mean ALOT!) new features lately. Honestly, They're all interesting, but enough is enough. There's a new feature called 'whos viewing me' which basically inform us, the users, about the people that regularly stalking our FS. Look, this new feature is OK by all means. It sort of protect our privacy. Dowh like there is one when we're online! But anyway, It kinda stopping me being stalker too. whoaa Tobat Tobatt! LoL I absolutely can tolerate with the other new features as well, letsee, they have slideshow for pictures, adding music video to profiles, new layout, etc etc (hey now i can't possibly recall everything can I?).
However, this morning I logged-in to FS to check a message from a friend. I thought, oh what-the-heck add one more pic on my prof, won't hurt anyone (plus, I'm in no mood to do assignments). I also hopped to some friends FS, check on their latest prof and piccies. This is when I'm in total shock and disgust to find another new feature from FS called 'forward to a friend'. So how does it work? first you go to their photo album and select slideshow. On your right sidebar, there will be few options available. One of 'em is 'forward to a friend'. This is basically a link for all pervvy pervertsons out there. Seriously, this is no less dignified as having a matchmaking network. This what's written in the default textbox message:
Me(your name) thinks you might enjoy Friend's (Friend's name) profile on Friendster. Go ahead, see for yourself.
There are several options to send this link. It's either you forward it to your FS friends or by email. Hence more pervvy pervertsons out there will come and join FS to drool over gorjes babes. Mind you, this don't always target on male perv only. There are loads of female perv too, believe you me.
This is just very disrespectful mankind to established such simple friends networking to become friends-double-quotes community. No wonder there are loads of underage harrasments happening via Internet. This could easily gives access for those sickos old men to perv on young kids. Can i just say, YUCK! That is why I'm beginning to loathe the existence of Friendster in this mighty earth. Jonathan Abrams, watch out for some legal assaults come knocking on your door any time soon.
You might think this is canggih as hell but I can assure you, it is so not. Look, what would you think if some strangers out there drooling and even having himself a 'treat' while staring at your piccies? How disgusting!! Not to mention, Male friendship is very tight sometimes they'll gladly share the 'joy' to their best mates. They, again, give themselves the most enjoyable free slideshows anytime they want. I mean, c'mon people, what if the piccies theyre lookin at are of your daughters or sons (today nothing is impossible!). I should say that Jon Abrams now think nothing but how FS bring profits for him.
Dear Sir,
You are the world most famous perv!
I even have more respect to Hugh Hefner now.
Yes Mr. Abrams.. enjoy your filthy mansion.
Yours disrepectfully,
-de.caff-
What more can FS bring to our beloved homes, I wonder. They might think it's as gaul as ever, but you know what... it's a perverts network. I wish not to verbalize anymore.
in all men's club.. anything could happen.
They'd say: "Hello Sons, get ready to grab some tissues!"
The Bitches.. ROWR!
Are we women when together like backstabbing enemies? Are we cats with massive attitude? Had Eve been so selfish to passed on her 'attitude' to her descendents without any consideration? Are we yet another reason for humankind to be kicked off from a place ought to be a haven at one time? Are we, women, the bitches of the centuries?
Women are destined to embrace "keep your friend's close and your enemies closer" principle, are we not? At one point, a girl's bestfriend is your most trustworthy companion. Yet when lightning strikes, they can be your sworn enemies you'd never imagined. Beware Beware! Women are bitches. It's our natural insting, is it not? I love when we bitch. I hate when they bitch about me. Ha!
Have you ever realised when women are gathered in one room they're always in their best interest trying to please and compliment each other... excessively. Aren't we all the pompous swaggers? We say friend out loud yet our mind plays trick with its demeanor arrogance to belittle anyone, everyone. We are the queen of our own soul.
"a friend in need is a friend indeed" is a metaphor. It only exists in reality TVs. We are the air-headed chicas. Blind to the unknown social life and immensely showered with faux luxuries. We are my friend, the socialites of the new millenium.
Don't assume your girlfriend is the best friend you ever known. The 'girlfriends'.. may be your worst friends. We can be far more threatening enemies than the politicians themselves. We are the villains behind Patience Phillips's dark mask. We are intolerable misdemeanor princesses.
We took oath. We are the daughters of Eve.
****
Fly: 0 Me: 1
Sheesshh
Gaarrsshhh Dogde me a bullet, I'm done. This is a total madness I tell ya!
pps: Gue heran ama those so-called anak GAUL berame" nULis SpErTi InI dAN mereka yang gak ngikutin dibilang old-fashioned dan GoG (read: jee-O-jee, arti: Gak Oke Gitu)? *see i can be 'maksa' as well.*
Question: Apa iya YanG Sp3Rt1 In1 DibIl4Ng Ok3? kok jadinya agak" R3t4RdEd Ya? Bikin Sakit mata tau gak!
Bisanya ngiri doank!
"Nulisnya dia bagus banget deh!"
Iri.
Kita sama. Hanya seorang biasa. Bukan penulis handal ataupun penulis populer seperti si mereka" itu. Entah dia seorang mahasiswa/i, pekerja kantoran, seorang ibu rumah tangga, atau seorang penggangguran berharap akan suatu oportunitas kerja.
It is true though.. knowledge does empower everything.
Andai berandai andai...
I should...
- Do my applications of metrics 2500 words essay, which due sometime today but I dont think I'd able to finish on time.
- Do new product development for wednesday presentation but with unfortunate events the lecturer asked to send her the slides by monday 5pm hence more daunting deadlines for me to do.
- Really put more focus on metrics considering this is my weakest link this semester. *I just can't understand the whole point of the subject!*
- Stop reading blogs after blogs, which by the way, I found an interesting blog comments on 'white ban - poverty history' campaign and instead he switched the buzz to 'hentikan gelang tolol' campaign. Nicely put I'd say.
- Stop posting for today and partly next week. Seriously.
- Quit thinking of what I'd buy at tomoz kookai and sass and bide warehouse sale. *see, i am that lazy to being able to spend my day shopping albeit all the assignments*
- Stop downloading music from torrent or my friggin' computer will explode any time soon.
- Seriously, stop writing rubbish on this blog. Now!
Damn stop writing bitch. Do your essay prontO!
Woman, quit it.
virginity... sacred or overrated?
I came across the topic whilst reading a book about university students today and their lifestyle. The book took one of Indonesian big city as its' background. It elaborates the true-blue of Indonesian youth. It came to a shock that as taboo as the elderly used to say, youths today are pretty much posses the law of 'free sex' in their everyday lives. They said Indonesia has the most Muslim population, but I suppose, religion is out of date. It don't matter to me about the adoption of 'free sex' in our lifestyle. Hey, I'm no hypocrite who says that it's sinner's path or whatever. I've lived long enough to notice that people DO have sex. However, what concerns me is the whole concept of religion and sex brought together in one nation under God, Indonesia. They just don't match.
If everyone just be open-minded and acknowledge the truth out there that people DO have sex: your brothers, sisters, your kids, friends, relatives, your PARENTS! (eww) See, why make it such huge taboo when in reality most people have experienced it at least once. I wonder when people got married (the singletons, not divorcees or widows/ers), they still expecting their au pair is a virgin? Well, of course they still expect that, but are they really a virgin? If one-night-stand is a common lifestyle, then why do people still highly praise their virginity?
1 in 3 women thesedays I presume has already had sex. Hence they've lost their virginity to some guy who probly will not be their man-to-be. Yet they casually accepted that, they do live such lifestyle. So why people still bother preaching religion into other people's personal anecdote. Dads, Mums, Ustadz, I guess your preaches are taken aside, came in one ear out the other. I just wonder, why bother? As far as I know, the more forbidden 'laws' are force-fed to kids thesedays, the more rebellious they would become. They really do embrace "papa don't preach" literally. I guess to some people, Islam in Indonesia is just another label for their religious status. It is nothing but a name on their identity card. I shouldn't also judge while I know I'm no better than them. I still have lots to learn about the faith I behold upon 'til the day I die. (not sure whether the word behold upon really suits well in that sentence.. hehe)
It's just that...
I hate hypocrites.
.... And there are one-to-many to count in our beloved country Indonesia.
Catching Tales...
JAMIE CULLUM is brilliant.
NO one cannot NOT like him, music-wise.
His music speaks out to youth. He's the missing link to today's music genre.
No other words can describe Jamie 'xcept CANGGIH MAAAKK!!!!
-nuff said.
Friendship, business, or sincerity
"A friend in need is a friend indeed."
A phrase can be so well-written and often covers many wisdom meanings. Yet somehow it can not always be well-accepted in everyone's mind, body and soul. An angelic heart always says the truth whilst the body may always prevent us to do good deed. Our act is not what our heart desire. Vice Versa.
Although at some point, the act is fulfilled as what heart desire but there is a tad hypocracy befell. Torn between friendship and business and insincerity. 'Frailty, Thy name is woman!' The name of that woman might be me yet I do not wish for it. Confused between sincerity and fraud and a fool. A dillema that I wish not to occur. Am I living in this world alone and entirely hesitant to give a helping hand? Am I that selfish ignorant?
I don't know what to do...
A Birthday & One Ambition
151st Birthday OSCAR WILDEFor a man who has touched the hearts of his younger generations...
He will stay alive.
Oscar Wilde,
A true legend that will never die.
Happy Birthday Mr. Wilde .
If You can get Distinctions why settle for Pass or Credits.
If You are capable to maximize your own effort, why delay?
If You were low-key and currently strive to own ambition, then buckle up it'll be a rough ride.
The present is of no importance.
It is with the future that we have to deal.
For the past is what man should not have been.
The present is what man ought not to be.
The future is what artists are.
Sitting all day on a blue couch, mumbling unknown words, ordering take aways, and bewildered the eyes with notorious visuals deceit
... will bring You to nowhere route.
You my dear,
always passionate to be better, to be Known better.
Don't halt for one sec. "The future is what artists are"
Oh dear Lord.
The horror just end. A sweet pain of relief I had indeed yesterday.
Consequences of my laziness has brought a mighty burden on ma shoulder this past week. I had a 4000 words report due friday evening and 2 presentations on saturday morning. Believe it or not, report was written on thursday mornin' and finished just bout 2 hours b4 due. Head on to individual presentation from 1 am to 6 am on sat mornin'. Did not have time to practice let alone make reasonable structure for it. Printed it out and began with the group presentation (mind you, the class started at 8 am that same morning!). For group presn I only need to practice since my group mate has done most of the work *tee hee*.
All's done. 7.30am Time to face those 5 dreading hours.
11 pm.
I.R: 'so who will do the talks today? I say there are two groups?'
11. 20 pm. 'okay, today's presentation is about marketeres turn to metrics to measure the impacts of their initiatives....'
--- after long discussions and several other presentations ---
1.10 pm. 'This presentation about advertising effectiveness. Uh.. Mmm.. Uhh.. Thank you. Any Question?'
Man! I suck when I'm not prepared! Hateful.
All I did were mainly 'Uhh', 'Mmm', 'Err..', *silent*.
I was so tired, damn frickin' nervous, clueless, and V. drousy! Dunno whether my pronounciation was okay too, but who de heck cares with pronounce if you don't know the hell ur talkin' about! Gaaah! Especially when there are two 'interesting' dudes sittin' there and actually listening while you do the talk but all you say was 'Uhh'? Gaaahh *pressure. pressure. pressure*
I wanna say it's all done and finished with. No need to bother cos it's the end of sem & prolly u wont see em no more, so no worries? But come to think of it, I can't just let go. That was a lousy day and prolly will haunt me for the rest of this sem, or prolly til next sem, who knows. =(
'Til 4 weeks time, I have 3 reports and 1 more presentation. None of 'em are prepared.
Dear God, help me.
mood swings. Beware!
Don't feel like writing anything. Badan gue lemes banget. kayaknya mau sakit kali ya? Oh well.
This morning mum went home to Indo. All's good. Will meet her again in a month, insyaAllah.
Ughh... I feel sick I wanna puke.
Hmm... craving.
Exactly.. 5 weeks and 2 days from now I'll be on my way home. It seems time runs really slow, but truly it's not. I still can't decide whether I want time to move faster or just slowly so I'd be more relaxed? I can't decide which I want.
I'm starving. Plenty food stored in the fridge, Alhamdulillah, but don't feel like eating any of 'em. Am I being ungrateful?
Again, Butterflies flyin' like crazy in my stomach. I've been stung by a gorgeous bee. Ha!
I cannot yet resists the smile. I too began to smile and felt embarrassed all at once.
Crazy talk.
Suddenly, I'm not feeling so good :(
Do I DARE?
To admit to have a major crush on somebody out of my league? No no, to be exact, someone who's truly out of reach. Bedanya kita udah kayak langit dan bumi. We are apart gazillion miles away. Again, I can only admire and adore from faraway distance. This is crazy I tell ya! My mind runs like a dozen dancing mad cows. Twirling and twirling never ends. I don't even dare to admit this 'thing' inside. It's SO embarassing I do not dare to tell anyone. No one must know. Let just hoped that tomorrow's better days without any of this crazy talk every again.
Gaaah! I don't even understand you. My God I don't even know you! What the hell's happening to me? Don't answer, Don't ask. I don't need me to speak out loudly about any of this with fear that I'd acknowledge his existence and my pathetic infatuation. I don't want him to be real. Not in my reality.
Oh God. Such a torment to feel head over heels for someone you barely know. Maybe this is the hormones talking? I really do hope so for then all this idiotic crush will evaporates in approx 7 days. hfff I can't even talk about it to anyone! This is surely the hormones talking. Yes, I'm sure. Definitely sure. Positive.
.... I'm definitely sure that I'm not sure. (sigh)
Argh! Migraine!
Memandang kagum pada dirinya dalam layar kaca
Apakah mungkin seorang biasa
Menjadi pacar seorang superstar.
tak mudah bagi diriku
Untuk ikuti gaya hidupnya
Semua orang suka padanya
Berat rasanya
No Oh No. No No NO!
duh gejala" mo 'dapet' kali yah.. LOL. is it? cudn't be. but cud it?
Ahhh pusing pusing pusssiiiinngggg!!!!
perut gue eneg, dada gue sesak, pikiran gue campur aduk entah kenapa, gak ada mood untuk ngapa2in.. berhari" resah gak ada juntrungannn.. isht I hate this.
Ada apa dengan GUEEE????????????
Hadoowwwhh!
doooowwwhhh kok gue gundah gulana gak enak ati kelimpungan entah kenapa kuadrattt!!! Kenapa sih gueeeeeeeee!!!!!!! gue mesti gimanaaa!!! hwaaaaaaahh!!! Hati gue kayaknya gak tenang aja.. sakit, sesak, nyesek, eneg campur aduk gak karuan.. sebenernya gue kenapaa??
hwaahh gue benci kalo lagi bgini !!
omong kosong
kayaknya.. gue udah terlalu jauh menghindar dari dunia mereka. Udah susah mau melangkah kesana lagi. Apa sudah saatnya untuk menghilang kembali?
kayaknya.. gue merangkak lagi ke fase itu. Sebuah mimpi. huh Memalukan. Kenapa sekarang selera gue berubah? Hanya dia yang terpampang indah di pikiran gue. Tapi siapa dia? sekali lagi.. gue terbuai dengan mimpi yang indah.. Ah, hanya lah sebuah fatamorgana. Seseorang berkata.. raihlah impian setinggi langit2 kamar, jangan setinggi langit. Karena langit2 kamar masih dalam jangkauan tanganmu. Mungkin gue selalu bermimpi karena gue selalu melebihi langit2 kamar, jauh diatas jangkauan tangan. Mungkin.. gue terlalu berharap yang tidak memungkinkan.
kayaknya.. gue perlu tidur. G o o d n i g h t dear void...
Karena saya malas...
Mending nulis2 aja.. mengasah otak gue juga ya gak *tsaaah*
First of all I'd like to comment on the latest posting on Australian Idolblog about the live verdict on 3 Oct 2005. A direct quote "The words "as painful as dripping acid onto a hemorrhoid" come to mind. If any one of these people make a cd it will be worse than the lovechild of Anthony Callea and Shannon Noll..." I can never be more agree to this comment. I felt it, I supposed half the nation also felt it. This year's show is horrific. All contestants sung like theyre on kareoke bar. None was spectacular as last year's. They just don't get my vote cos they never gave us that VIBE! I can honestly say, anthony callea and shannon noll are much better than them. I don't even like them. To me they have no character. They built their characters during the making of their album. I hate that cos then they got 'Sony BMG's puppet' written all over. I guess, this goes the same for whoever wins Australian Idol 2005. I wonder if they chose the wrong finalists? All 13 of 'em.
Off topic, I learned last night about Maslow's hierarchy of Needs. Pretty interesting. Here's the chart..
Mungkin yang udah terpenuhi hanya sampai level 2. Itu juga bukan karena effort gue sendiri. Selanjutnya, itu perjalanan yang mesti gue tempuh sendiri.. Riweuh ya kalo diliat? But this may be useful for our own motivation.
I'm bored and friggin' lazy. isht
Shaum Ramadhan Eve...
This late afternoon I went to Uni as usual, walked 10 minutes to main road, took any tram and then lilydale train. The journey was pretty much similar as the days before. At a peak hour as such, it's quite obvious that I'd rush my way to platform 2. Today wasn't quite as yesterdays. Today, I noticed something different on my way to Uni. Today, I saw a family. They were just few meters away from where I stand. A father holding his guitar, a little daughter was beside him carrying small tamborine and harmonica trying to be a street musician as his daddy. Behind them, there's a lady sat on the corner wrapped up in a black cloth. I don't know who she is. I don't know who they are. Theyre just another random people I met in my ordinary life. But the little girl seems glee with laughter and smiles. Her daddy is only a street musician, but at that moment it looks as if theyre okay with it, they are complete. Suddenly, I felt warm and fuzzy feeling rumbling in my stomach.. They are just an simple family living a very simple life. His little daughter is prolly just about 5 years old or younger. But she looks as if she has the whole world upon her hand. Her clothes are clean, neat and pretty. With those tiny purple boots, red dress, and pair of wings on her back. She doesn't look like a street musician's daughter. She looks like a kid. Just a kid, with her innocent face and happy laughters. She is so lucky, I thought. I don't think I've ever saw such view. Not when I was back at my home country.
They were the opposite of what I just saw earlier today. Their clothes are all shabby and torned. Sometimes, they walked barefoot cos they can't afford to buy pair of flip flops. They don't have wings on their back cos they prolly have other things to think of beside having a set of furry wings on their back. Their daddy might also be street musicians, but they also have to stand beside him with every effort earning a little penny of their own. Dear God, don't we all your beloved creation? Don't we all made of the same element? So why does living in different continent could separate our lives like day and night? Sometimes I think this might be our punishment for being hypocrites, to ourselves, to everybody else, and to You. I suppose forgiveness is not on the agenda.
I just hoped for a better life, for all of us, for those kids. They don't need to suffer at that fragile age. Let maturity comes before they know the word suffer and misery. I know I've complaint alot about my life, but truly, mine is much better than those kids'. I just hoped, someday when the world is a better place to live, these kids can leave their shabby clothes for nice and neat attires, cute little mini boots, complete with a pair of wings on their back. And all I see is that their bright faces and they are overjoyed just being kids. Someday, people will -again- adore them because they are just kids who are naturally born to be adored and not mannequins that people could just ignore and walk through. I can't say I've helped enough for them to have such dreams. I, myself, a selfish ignorant. Shame.
Exactly two and half hour from now is the first day fasting on Ramadhan 1426 H. It's my second Ramadhan with mum here. I don't know whether I'm blessed or to act as if it's nothing. I tried not to make promises that I know I cannot keep. A day before Ramadhan, I got tested for my faith. During class today, a classmate brought wine before presentation started, which is a nice ice-breaker. People were drinking wine in small sample glasses. He offered me some. I refused. Although temptation was high cos most of them were drinking and the bittersweet smell of wine was all over the room. I admit, I was tempted for a second. It was something that got me thinking, westeners' social life is all about drinking. What will I do when I'm in their social cycle? Will I then have the power to decline?
We'll get the answer when I'm already in their lives. Til then, I still dare to say No. It's late.. I ended here with Ramadhan Mubarak to everyone.
ps: at a time as this before Ramadhan, I hate to admit but I kinda miss him. I wonder how he's doing now? I hope he's doing all the best with his new life. Oh well, too much MG, KLBK Kumat! blech. wake up.
Boys: Sometimes a girl just needs one
Hokay. Confession time.
I hate to admit that these past few days I started to watch again a chinese series entitled.. *djeng djeng* meteor garden.. Hwaaaa *malu*. Don't laugh okay. Let's face it, the movie is keteng but surely entertaining. It's a basic love story between man and woman who always at each others' throat but deep down they really have strong connection and that 4 letter words, Love.. *and the audience goes 'Awwwww'* (sick).
I always enjoy watching that movie, over and over again I never get bored. Maybe almost the same feeling when watching Friends. I repeat, Almost. You know what, I know I'll get the beating of my life by saying this, but I think there are not much difference between 'meteor garden I' and 'the O.C'. Seriously. The main plot is so obvious about, again, love story of two people who come from different background. They were at each others' throat at the beginning, but soon after they can't get their hands' off to each other. In simplest term, they were foes but then they were lovers.. *Awwwww* (apaan sih!)
I watched the series early this morning and suddenly I realised, the main character the famous tao ming se (haduh apal!! maluuu! ) is a lot like *drums rolling* Ryan from the O.C. *grin* To clarify, the similarities are based on their character only, not physically or their real life. You know, I laughed myself off when I realised these similarities between MG and OC. It's friggin' funny how I, once again, crazed over the heels just because of a chick flick.
oh you know what's most embarassing?
Yes, there's more..
I kinda like the main character played on MG... no no don't laugh yet, hear me out. He's a typical character that all ladies would adore, cmon admit it. who wouldn't want a bad-boy-look kinda guy? Plus, he's hot. And so is Ryan of OC. He has that bad boy look but eventually he came out of his shell. Then we realised that he ain't that bad. Cmon, don't be such hypocrites.. all women want that perfect picturesque man in her life. Don't you dare to squint at me lady. I know you know what I meant. All chick flick always portrayed a man with all his perfectness (is it a word?). Not just physically but also mentally and of course career-wise. Not true? well why don't you ask those spinsters running in and out pubs and dating scenes? They only search men with specific criterias. Therefore we love our chick flicks, are we not? Cos they visualised the dreams. I'd say OC and MG can be considered chick flick too. My theory is that all chick flicks have to have hot but cool and sensitive type of guys so that he'll become another hearthrob and the ladies would just pour out their undying love to these guys. True, no?
Oh well. A page is enough for this ramblings about our pretty boys.
Boys oh Boys...
sometimes a girl just needs one.
Blog
Sperti yang udah gue bilang dari dulu, gue gak suka blog yg udah komersil. Gue bilang mereka itu jadi palsu. Seperti yang selayaknya masyarakat umum tau blog itu adalah salah satu media untuk numpahin segala macem uneg" yang nyangkut dari ujung kepala elo ampe ujung kaki. Lo bisa dengan bebasnya tumpahin ke blog space apapun yang lo punya. Lo bisa sebebas"nya ngatain orang, maki", sumpah serapah sampai tulisan politik ekonomi sosial dan segala macem yang berbobot. Seperti layaknya ber-alter ego, elo punya dunia sndiri dengan keberadaan blog" ini.
Tapi semua itu bisa aja pudar dengan increase-nya expectation para komentators blog elo. Mungkin aja setelah sekian lama, elo jenuh dan begah dengan karya tulisan" elo itu sndiri karena merasa elo tidak bebas lagi. Banyak dari beberapa blogs yang gue baca adalah seperti yang gue sebutkan tadi. Hari ini udah gue temukan 2 blogs (well, 3 if includes my other blog :p) yang dengan sengaja 'berpamitan' ke frequent readers nya dan declared temporarily hiatus. Gak nanggung" hiatus ampe bisa bertahun" ato undecided. Gue salah satu pembaca yang lumayan sering mampir ke tempat" mereka, dari tulisan mereka.. bisa dibilang mereka memang menulis sebagai satu cara untuk numpahin segala pikiran mereka dan blog sudah bukan lagi menjadi media yang bisa mereka pakai tapi gue yakin mereka akan tetap menulis. If I were them, alasan gue bisa berpamitan dengan dunia tulis maya mungkin karena gue jengah dengan orang" yang datang sa'karepe dewe ngalor ngidul ke tempat kebebasan gue dan pastinya.. gue gak akan merasa leluasa untuk menumpahkan smua apa yang ada di kepala gue. Tapi, sekali lagi, ini saya bukan mereka.
Oddly enough.. meledaknya dunia blogging bisa jadi hanya dianggap sebagai fad. Untuk sesaat, it has its' glory, but soon enough... it'll lay down low at the grass. Hambar, basi. Untuk sesaat, menulis itu menjadi sebuah trend, menulis itu keren. Yah paling tidak, it's a positive fad.
Selanjutnya apa lagi ya?
oops they did it again.
It seems if we burst in anger.. they will be most satisfied. They've achieved victory. We don't know who to blame... who we want to blame. Usually we just take assumptions and quick accuses to point out the suspects. Are you certain, completely sure, of your accuses? How many blogs, articles, newspapers, TV media have reported their views about it? Too many no one can count.
I want to scream and yell out to those bastards and bitches who did it, but that'd pleased them so. I know I'm a complete ignorant when it comes to this. Maybe it's my way to find escape. Not caring for the world. It didn't work so well, I still feel awful.
Why there have to be greed and power?
Off the topic, I finally went to Art Gallery to see the Dutch Masters. A bit dissapointed cos the paintings that I want to see are not there. They only brought 1 painting of Vermeer and not the one I wanted to see.
I still want to see Vermeer's 30 other collections!! I want to see girl with pearl earring !!!!!!! Gaaahh!
last but not least, all my condolences.
good friend, great friend
End of theories, come in moi. Don't know what's gotten into me these past year, everything seems different cos things changed, people moved on. But there I am.. stood still like one clueless statue with no one and nothing to forgo. Suddenly I realized that I left all despair and misery miles and miles away to find a drop of happiness. I did found it, just a tad.. but surely made my days a lot better than I could ever imagined. However, at those times, I was satisfied rather quickly. I only wanders to those surround me and I'm at peace merely because I've found my comfort zone. Years gone by without noticing that the universe keeps moving forward and it stroke me deep to realized that I've lost it. That one tad of happiness, 2 cups of laughter and smiles, and 1/2 spoon of bitterness sweet. Again, the world becomes another jungle and I'm lost to nowhere arrow.
I've said too many times to just lift up these big butts and get a life. But do you know how exhausted I am to explore the jungle once more to find another comfort zone? I'm so tired of faux laughter and all those insignificant small talk. I'm not me when I'm around unknown others.
Yet I know that it's not how we meant to survive. We are human beings with necessity to interact with the others. However tough this might be, we ought to fight it and give life a chance once more. I know what I should and shouldn't do but to interpret them into action is a long bridge I cannot walk through.
I am clueless this way.
People say c'est la vie.. I say, Fuck la vie.
Art, Music, Rock n Roll baby!
I'm intrigued.
I know pictures, but I still can't interpret them.
Maybe it's true.. My brain only halved function.. The Right brain empowers the lefties.
Maybe art is just not my thing..
But they are beautiful interpretation of people's emotion, I supposed.
Love: It had to be You.
lost in translation
Man: Because no man can be friends with a woman that he finds attractive. He always wants to have sex with her.
Woman: So, you're saying that a man can be friends with a woman he finds unattractive?
Man: No. You pretty much want to nail 'em too.
Denial
Man 1: When someone is not that attractive, they're always described as having a good personality.
Man 2: .... She could be attractive with a good personality, or not attractive with a good personality.
Man 1: So which one is she?
Man 2: Attractive.
Man 1: But not beautiful, right?
You Fall Madly In Love
If only life works the same way as those in movies. If finding soulmate is as easy as flipping a hand. If falling in love is hard enough and yet to find a friend who will console you at any time of day is more complex than it seems. But at the end of the day, to finally able to find all those in life is priceless. This journey in life is a one-way trip. Either you hate it or love it, there's no turning back. It's one-way nonreturnable ticket, take it or leave it. Oh, and it's a short-trip as well. So as a wiseman once said, find your happiness before your whole life started to flash back at you.
Blech. It's so easy to talk than to act isnt it? I'm one example of one socially awkward girl living in a mass crowded city. As kids nowadays, don't just tell me about it.. explain to me how!
memories...
- Maroon 5 - Songs about Jane
- Craig David - Slicker than average
- Australian Idol 2004 - MartyChanelDaniel
- Hanson - middle of nowhere
- Christina Aguilera - stripped!
- OST the Faculty
- Simple plan - no pads, no helmets, just balls
Songs can be your guide down to the memory lane. I have different memories embedded in each song with different friends, foes, and lovers. Some happy memories, they trully are. The list would go on til music has stopped to voice its' beautiful sound to the universe.
Pictures may define visually of someone's journey in life. However, music is much better interpretation of your inner soul. Only you that own the memories. Only you who knows the true happiness lies within. Isn't it a wonderful bliss?
Oh well... I'm just a girl so in love with music.
ps: Wallace and Gromit: the curse of were-rabbit is an amazing movie. The story line is simple and certainly different from all of those american's disney movies. It's very british.What's most awesome is that the whole character were made out of clay. Very clean and spotless, indeed! The production was made for years before it finally premiered in cinema in 2005. well dowh! everything is claymation. Imagine how fragile clay can be and they made a full length movie with it!
Two thumbs up.
tesselaar
Don't you just love tulips blooming at the early spring.. They really do brighten your days.
ps: Craigie davidie is promoting his new album. He's old-er. Well duh, he's now 24. Ah, we had some great memories together. LoL
Lovin' the days!
Monday Morning Rain is Falling...
It's Monday again.. blech. I know I said I love mondays, but turns out that's only for the entertainment. Overall, I don't quite like the day monday. It's the first day of the week which means I only have one week left to finish all aments. Time's ticking and yet I have not motivated to finish everything soon. Also today's weather forecast was sposed to be SUNNY! I woke up and look out the window, there they are, dark clouds covering the whole southbank area. Ma balcony also covered with water from the rain this early morning. It's still raining right now, but just few drizzles. Just about the same! today was not suppose to have drizzles, showers, or even rain. Today is all about sun, warm, and clear skies!! I had everything planned for today, but now's ruined. I hate going out when it rains. Besides, I had scheduled to finish ma 'decision tools' case study last saturday and sunday, but heck as you could read on sunday's postings, I absolutely did nothing that relates to aments and books. Today is already monday and I also have scheduled another aments to do but of course they are postponed a day later due to the laziness attack I had yesterday. All the schedules are screwed! hence, I'm too! I hate uni...
I can't remember when the time that I not complains about ma life. I made this life seems more dramatic than it actually is. People can say that life happens only once so make it worth to live. If only it would be that simple. I read somewhere that choices are given to man and we should be thankful to God for giving us such options. But, what if we took the wrong choice and unable to undo or move forward? Choices lead to more risks. People living the life would certainly be okay with risks. Theyre the risk-taking type. Maybe once I need a dare. A dare to live the life the fullest with half-full glass. Unlike this current life, which I presumed living life with half-empty glass. Perhaps only empty glass. What are those expressions mean anyway? Half-full and -empty glass? I can never understand.
Yesterday I had a talk. Afterwards, I kinda have this thought whether or not we'd end up like our parents? Honestly, I don't wanna be like parents. They can be very selfish at times and quite unreasonable. It's like the more older we -the kids- the more childish our parents are. It's sort of lifecyle, everything just moves round around and never stops til the end of time. We, kids, have to be reasonable enuff to take care of our mums and dads. As they get older, they become children themselves, with wants and needs that have to be fulfilled. I don't even like kids, but now seems as if I've already become the mother of a family. It's not easy you know. Maybe I used to be happy cos I'm able to running away from it. but now, I'm trapped and don't have the heart to runaway again. Tragic innit?
She seems to have her victory when someone shows hatred for him. She looks as if she won. I don't like that. I'm able to see but cannot speak it. She tries to be all friendly and forgiving... but only to show that she'd be more superior that he could ever do. I know his flaws and I certainly know her flaws. She ain't that angelic as well. She's no more superior to anyone as far as I'm concern. She don't own anyone anymore. She can't think she has won, can she? Unbelievable. She also asked me to find this someone that blatantly refused when asked to join him. Why now? Why does she want to find now? Why not years ago when all things were screwed up? Is it just because she found out this person has refused to be in colony with him? So it looks as if this person loyal to her and not him? That, money is not everything on this person's mind? Unlike the other one whom she now have certain hatred because this other person choses to have a decent job with good money rather than earning only a penny?
Sometimes, I don't like ma instant judgements lead me into. All of em are very negative and not constructive. They'd gave me headache all day. But hey, I can not speak them out, I certainly can write them down. It's about the same, isn't it? Oh well...
On diff topic,
I watched a preview for tonight's tv show.. the show entitled 'sharks on trial'. How comical is that?! I don't understand what happens inside people's mind these days...
And Few Hours Later...
Still have no result for any aments. Did nothing but watch DVD and er, that's it really. I'm SO Friggin' Lazzyy!!
Whenever I'm at home all day and not doing any aments, I blog. Ergo, I've posted 3 threads today (including this one). Is that pathetic?
But anyway,
Remember 'the Dukes of Hazzard' the TV series not the big screen. That was some hot movie back in those days. Honestly, I haven't see the remake of it yet but I already have certain doubts of the quality. The dukes of hazzard was originally about speed, car chasin', three cousins with massive talent for destruction, and yes of course hot pants and bikinis. I vaguely remembered the TV series, but I sure remembered the southern accent, the car chase and very boyish acts from the two dukes. Daisy duke was a major babe back then. I think this movie remake wanted to re-create the 'daisy duke' hype once more. The hot pants, the southern blonde chick, and of course spotless bikini bod.
What I regreted the most is the promo they brought for this remake seems all about daisy duke (i.e. jessica simpsons). Seriously, I ain't sayin' she not looks fine in those tiny red bikinis, au contraire she's very much a hottie in them, but cmon there are other means of that movie. Also, I read in one magz that the part of daisy duke was a toss between jessica and britney spears. However, close to production, britney was unable to have the daisy duke 'image'. So the part was spot on given to Ms. Simpsons herself. There's also the dukes soundtrack which is sung by Ms. Simpsons. The song is titled 'these boots are made for walking'. I reckon, the producers/writers made the movie (hence the song) with britney spears images on their minds, cos the movie and the song surely no match for jessica's image. Don't get me wrong, she looks V. good in those bikinis and hot pants. Her voice is also not bad for the song. However, Jessica is just not that type. Maybe she's trying to have new image, I dunno, but surely it's an extreme shift. The song 'these boots..' sounds lot like britney's music. Remember her album entitled 'britney' with example one of her single 'toxic'? That's awfully sound familiar as 'these boots..' don't you think? Too bad britney had to postpone her career. If she's still in the business and had nailed that 'daisy duke' part, it would be huge improvement for her career. She'd be, once more, the madonna of her time. Tough luck Ms. Spears.
I reckon the actors for the duke boys were perfectly casted. Johnny knoxville and seann william scott surely have the attitude as the dukes. They're the boys of boys. I really have to watch the movie and could mock entirely for miss. daisy's act. I want to know what's all the fuss about jessica's (man-made) buttocks. LoL. Seriously, I heard rumours that said those bottoms were pushed up with something underneath those pants. Pretty freaky huh?
I just hope that the movie is much more fun than the TV series. Hopefully, it's not all about Jessica's hot pants, pushed-up bottoms and huge knockers.
I leave you with piccies of the movie, both original version and the remake. Spot the difference?
- 1979
- 2005
Yeee Haawww !!!
Oh Lazy Me
Mid break doesn't motivate me at all to get any work done. Instead, it just brings me more lazier than ever! The idea of a break stimulates ma brain to lay low on the books and just go out day and night. Hence no studies and more fun. That's what mid-break means, doesnt it? Ergo there's this little voice inside that keeps urging to have a walk outside on such a lovely sunday and just go nuts. It surely the devil in me that'll drives me insane close to the end of sem. Need to kill the devil and bring out the angel. Why the good is always covered by the bad? Purely vanished and invisible over the evilness of being. Whatever that means.
Come on. just another month to go and you'll be facing a trippin' Four months break.. That'll be long enuff to get youre mojo back, won't it? Cmon.. What's a month compared to four whole frickin months??? Get the devil out of ya!!
Guilt
I feel guilty for ditching them everytime they have kindly asked me to join them. Something frightens me, maybe that's why I prefered to stay low. This may just be another perfect way to non-existent. It's been what? almost a year... This got to end. But how?
Spring break.. Woo hoo!!
Nah, that's only to fill up something for the title. The post here will not be about spring break. Well, not entirely.
Spring break starts very late this year, seriously. I will only have one last class after the break ends. Now, how's that a mid/spring break?!?! It almost the end of semester and they gave me a break??? dun think this counts as a break since all aments are due AFTER the break. Blech. Nice timetable btw! Cuppa days ago I counted all my 'left-over' aments. Guess how many are they.. 8! Yes people, EIGHT more aments to go. Dang. End of sem is not until 27 October but the final due date for the last ament is 11 Nov. Today is the 24th September, so it ain't that long way to the end now is it? I sort of finish one draft... Err, it's just a draft dumbass!
But nyways, nuff bout school stuff. It's not a good subject to focus on this lovely morning. Oh how weird is it to have me posting at 9 am in the morningg!! I can hardly wake up this early then again to actually alive enuff to write something. Ha! Well, not so weird considering I slept at 11 last night due to massive exhaustion.
Reason is because yesterday we went on a road trip to phillip island to watch the little pinguins!! They were these little cute things walking like drunken birds. LoL Unfortunately we were not allowed to take any photographs even before the pinguin parade started!! That much money and no memorable pictures to restored? Whatta rip-off!! Pinguin parade is basically little pinguins came out of the sea and nesting on their burrows behind the bushes. One thing that really irritated me the most is that they walked REALLY i mean EXTREMELY slow. Almost beat a group of turtles! How.Everr(!) the reason why they walked that slow at the beginning and faster soon after is becaue they were the wussi-est animals ever! They were terrified of seagulls. Logically, of course, there were seagulls all over the beach at night. Those pinguins have to cross the beach to reach the bushes and to get there they must walked pass hundreds seagulls. The reason they walked very slow when reaching the shore is, I reckon, first they must formed some sorta strategy to avoid seagulls and us 'the visitors', then they run as fast as they could to finally swamped in the bushes to be safe. Once got to the bushes, they find their burrows and nesting. Funny thing was there was a pinguin standing close on his burrow and was screaming so Loud. In front of him there was a lady pinguin. Why I knew that they were male and female pinguins, cos of soon after, well, there were voices. Very Loud, they kinda irritating. We came at the right season, to watch pinguins mate! Ha! According to the info at the pinguin centre, when they mate, they can be extremely loud and very RoWDY! O yeah baby wontcha cum in ma crib. LOL
The pinguins at phillip island were called little pinguins cos they are so damn frickin small!! Theyre about the same size as the seagulls. They smell extremly fishy as well. A friend of mine was very eager to squished one of the pinguin cos theyre so round and seemed quite chubby. Whilst for me, I was so impatient to see them walked like that, I just wanted to push them and roll them like a ball so they'd walked faster. People, these are the kind of acts that would eliminate each and every pinguins alive on the planet. Ha!
I will leave you with these cuties pinguinss... They were so darn cute I want to brought one home. (don't they remind you of joey's hugsy?)
Sick yet of pinguins?
Hokay let's move on to the next.
I read this girl's blog. She don't know I read it though. Never leave any comment on her page. yet after reading her postings for several months, I kinda have this feeling that she has an extreme issues with herself. She seems insecure and honestly, quite weird. She's proud of what she have achieved (which is lots) but the way she published her victories are somehow, again, weird. On her last posting she made this list, but to me that list seems as if someone is not giving 100% attention to her, she'd just presumed as they were not exist or she prefers to runaway. Maybe for her those are good ways to deal with things. Ha! Who am I to judge? I, however, feels that as if she's covering herself in this huge black roof on top of her. Although she talks about her being aggresive and very outspoken, but maybe deep down she did all that to cover what's real inside. Seems familiar? I wish I know her so that I could actually prove my speculations, cos all my judgements could be wrong. Maybe those she wrote are the actual personality she has. I'm no psychic anyways. So judgements based on no academic knowledge are very bias. Oh well..
sweetest goodbye
in love and hate feeling for maroon5. Always have been.
There are just too many memories hidden in all of their songs. Great memories.. but too sad to remember. I miss the past. It was indeed a sweetest goodbye. Adieu.
Man Drought
There's an absolute hillarious report on 'today tonight' about how aussie is lacking single men aged thirty-something. Women with the same age group are having difficulties on finding the 'One'. Whilst their biology clock keeps on ticking, the right Mr. Man have not yet come to their door step. You might say they're in deep desperation to settle down. Ergo, Today Tonight crew was there to help. The crew also asked an expert to statistically analyze where are the hiding caves of those potential Mr. Man. The expert found their hiding caves based on their suburbs location. I feel sorry for those men. Uh, on second thought, scratch that. I don't feel sorry one bit for them. Having given the report, I assume, men now knows that women are desperate for their love and affection. This wud result in their bloated arrogance on selecting their 'perfect' woman. Men would become very pleased to have the ladies throw themselves at 'em while they wouldn't need to move from their seats. I wonder if desperate women might lost their dignity? I guess time really do switch in a very fast pace.
Long before goats can gloat (................. what the?!?!!??)
Much more than ten years ago... the rules were not alike as today. As far my memories could remember, there were times when women were praised as goddesses. The world of men encircles around the ladies. Ladies were not meant to run around to catch the perfect match. Not only that, were they meant to have cat fights with the other man-hunters just because the rule's 'snooze you loose'? What in a bloody world do we live?? Maybe it is okay since long ago women always want to be treated equal as men... Maybe this is one of the consequences. Who knows?!
Ps: WHO THE HELL IS ARLISA ARDHIANI?!?!?! She sent me emails asking me to connect to namesdatabase.com. WHAT IN THE WORLD IS NAMESDATABASE.COM?!?!? It seems to be as another pointless website. I tried to send her (him?) email asking who she is. but there's a failure notice saying that the email address is unavailable? So weird. Just as reminder in the future, her email addy is arlisa_19@hotmail. So whoever owned the email addy, Lemme know!!
The weirdest thing!
I got free tram ticket! a daily ticket. How lucky am I! The reason is, the stupid machine on-board ate my money and I reported it to the driver. While stopping on Flinders station (which is the main station), there are some officers outside (u know, for daily check in). And, some people on the tram were very nice. They told me to inform the faulty at the railway station and claim ma money back. I thought, ah screw it. Too much trouble for a little penny. I listened to their advice without having any thought to actually took action on it. Not until, an officer came into the carriage and checked on the machine before he walked out the tram again. At that time I was just stood still and tried to copied the number on the machine. However some passangers told me to report this to those officers outside. I was quite hesitant but Oh Whatta heck. Those people have been so nice to gave me those info. I walked off the tram and reported the faulty to them. Evidently, they knew that the machine was out of service and guess what.. They gave me a daily ticket as a replacement for ma money. They gave me a ticket worth 6 bucks! One thing they didn't know... I only put in 70 cents into the machine before it finally broke down. Ha! How bout that officers! Luckily they don't asked how much money have I put into the machine. *Phew*
But I like the fact that they are very responsible in their job and don't asked a lot of questions when customers are in the right side of the law.
On a lighter note, I watched 'charlie and the chocolate factory' today. One comment... A-M-A-Z-I-N-G!! The cinematography is SO Tim Burton and his 'big fish'. Very fairy tale and full-on imagination. After watching the movie, I'm SO in love with Johnny Depp. He is So A-W-E-S-O-M-E!! (feels like an idiot spelling all these words). I haven't watched the old version of 'willy wonka and the chocolate factory' so cannot compare between the two. However I spose that the old version has better story compared to the new one. Why? Old version is musical, it ought to be better than the commercial version. By commercial, I meant the new version. It don't change my impression of Johnny depp as willy wonka though. He is very weird for a wonka. Maybe wonka is weird? Hmm better see the old version soon.
OH! another bizzarre moment of today is that I almost saw cameron diaz on the cinema today! There was a premiere of her latest movie 'in her shoes' screening at that very cinema. She ought to come with toni collete at 6.45 pm. Whilst I was out of the cinema around 6.20 pm. People stood at every spot they could reach. They were waiting anxiously for Ms. Diaz. I wanted to wait and see her as well but there were just too many people lined up on every side of the main rim of the mall. Hm, can't get the picture? Well, you know that most malls were built in almost like a tube, which from every level you could see down to the main stage at the ground level? That's where people were waiting today. I tried to wait for several minutes but that didn't last long. Ma stomach needed more attention than to wait Ms. Diaz to come. LOL So there I went straightaway for a jap cuisine. A little regret not to wait patiently for Ms. Diaz before went to that jap place. For one thing, I've never ever seen any real live hollywood celeb before. To live in Australia is another chance to actually meet someone famous. I will definitely not gonna see any hollywood celeb back in ma hometown. Heck, I can't even imagine it. The reason I wasn't quite excited to wait for Ms. Diaz is cos of ma sis. She's not that fun when it comes to things like this. She's not that fun to NOT be uptight. This made me, not enthused to do anything ridiculous and out of control, which equals... double uptights! hfff
Oh well... today was fun. I bought 2 clothes as well! pink bolero and green skirt. Ha! theyre no match to each other but theyre cheap. So no worries. :)
ini... itu... dan lain lain.
Don't feel like writing anything... well, I have loads in ma mind for the past week.. yet I don't feel like sharing them to anyone. Not to worry, they are not of those significant thoughts (Do I ever think of anything imperative? Doubtful!).
I'm gettin' tired of alive. Don't you? Not that I'm saying I wish I was dead. Heck no. It's just that there are one too many unjustified disturbances in life that are quite devastated to compromise. I don't want in five years time to glance back to the past and see nothing but debris of shattered beings and misconstrued sets of beliefs. I don't want to look at the times when the earth is just getting older and yet not wiser somehow. I can't help but to wonder when will judgement day comes? Do we not allowed to have such thought? I ain't trying to feel mellow at this gorgeous time of day. I just thought that maybe there are excessive living beings crammed in this small rounded planet. I wonder if mars is already open for public?
I watched michael buble on tv last night ( Yes, I do realise it's a complete diff topic from earlier, but Do I give a fuck? Hell no!). He said he has chicken legs with big feet, and he wore pointy shoes. Boy, do men nowadays have girly sense of fashion, don't they? Men wearing way too pointy shoes, what do they want us girls to think eh? Pointy... Something? LOL Last night there was an award show for AFL players. The show was actually held just few blocks away from my apartment. The place is one of the prestigious entertainment centre in the city called Crown. They always have awards and such, so there are always loads of celebrities come in and out from crown. Although I often go there yet I have not walk pass any celeb. How weird is that?! Well, let me tell you. It ain't that peculiar considering I have none knowledge whatsoever of Australian Celebs. All I know are those of most well-known celebs. For instance: Bert newton (morning talk show), Kochi (news show), ROVE (tuesday talk show, he's waay famous, and ridiculously hillarious!), thirsty merc (but only familiar with the frontman cos he's got a freeky hairdo), andrew G and James mathison (thanks to aussie idol), and several blokes from 'neighbours' whom their names I'm not familiar of. Hmm... having these written down, I realise that they're all men celebs. Wonder why? *grin* Isn't aussie always renowned for their women? Hmm... Kangaroo perhaps, but women?? *scratches head* Oh yes, Gretel killeen (spell?) of big brother. Thats it! LOL C'mon ladies.. kick some arses will ya!
Other bits of entertainment, do you think eric cartman has potential to be a ruler? hm, I'm not saying hitler, but maybe Bush's replacement as a starter? Heck that'll be jolly! He has the talent to be a stubborn ass and everything has to be done according to what's right to cartman. He's a pain in the ass but you've gotta love him eventually. At some points, he twists our first impressions of him and able to reverse our speculations of his attitude. He's a devil in disguse.. that's what he is. But the devil I love. LMAO
Beyond tomorrow.... is how we always imagined of the future. Although impressive gadgets and/or technologies always appear on the show, however, in reality they may not be applicable or even implemented. Mass production, I mean. It is still an entertaining show to watch, but careful, too much imagination can be a catastrophic agenda for the current life as well. Confuse? Ha! I'm too. I'm just writing shitloads. Dont have any idea why anyone wants to read these (esp you! whom currently reading.LoL)
One question: Do technologies able to numb the nation?
Why I ask, you asked? Our ancestors don't have computers and all cool gadgets like we have today, still, they have made remarkable inventions. I bet people today only know how to implement those ideas into something more 'gadgety' (a.k.a CooL!). If you give more attention, engineers and doctors are only establish new innovations that will eventually ruin the existence of living beings in the universe. They wanted to know too much of everything. Most comical investigation they've always try to do is to find the essense of God. Duh. Too much queries in life are meant to be unknown, I suppose. But yes, I do think technologies nowadays have numb the nations. Brain does not function as it was years ago. Who do we blame? You, Them, or Ourselves? Think about it.
(or not, whatever.)
