4th November 2012

You know that movie Love Actually? I always remember that movie's monologue. The scene at the airport, it was past 9-11. Hugh Grant narrated: everywhere you see at the airport, people smiling or laughing seeing their friends/relatives/loved ones arriving or departing. people hugging and kissing. you will see that love is actually all around.

That bit of the story was true in my case.
29th october 2012, terminal 3 Soetta 2.15PM we bid our farewell. Unknowingly it will be our last hug, our last laugh, our last smiles, our last tease, our last happiness, our last kiss.

I wish you health and happiness that you always hoped for.
Venus satelite has evaporates, never more to spread their signals.

4th November 2012 Truths were spoken.

Truth hurts, but in the end happiness will prevail.
Adieu, Amor.

Closure

Siapa bilang lebih baik sakit gigi daripada sakit hati?
Meggy Z pasti gak kenal ponstan. gak punya dokter gigi.
Sakit hati? cuma ada waktu.
Sakit? ya terus aja sakit. 

Then there is us.

2011 is coming to its end.
Before we say farewell, a recap wouldnt be much harmful, would it?

2011 played a roller coaster emotion in my life. Learning all kinds of emotion. The closure on a dear loved one is the beginning of another enormous feeling i have never experienced before.

My plans... Ah, screw them.

2011.. is unexpectedly a year full of self-reflect.

I bid goodbye to melbourne this year. This time is for real. I chose jakarta, with all my heart's content.

I wont forget how it raised me.

2011...
is when him and I become us. An old friend coming out of the blue..
We still have a long road ahead. We're parted by different cities. We're 2 very different individuals. We live in a very opposite lives. Him and i to become us wasnt a smooth ride. But i'm very grateful that he wants to be by my side. Regardless.

Our story is just a baby. Tiny and fragile.
Hopefully, our prayers will bring us to a strong and mature lifelong journey. InsyaAllah, amin.

2011,
Thank you.
To have helped me to choose people over place.
I left my adolescence in melbourne. I will live my adulthood in indonesia. Happily, with all heart's content. InsyaAllah.

Hopefully, with him too.

She said

You can care without Love.
but you can't love without care.

Haha!
I can so define whom the first and the latter.

Thanks to my Chinese twin!
You rawk.

Adieu boy

Finally, thursday was the day to find all the answers. To open heart.
It was fine. Faint of heart was collapsing. I was surrendering.

Last night my eyes were open wide.
We live very different lives you and i. Of you asking me to leave my friends, is one impossible request for me to do.
I love who i am. I love my life. I love my friends.
You can't tell me otherwise.

Men will always be third in line after my mom and friends. You cant change that.

I thought my heart was surrendering to you, but the life you and i chose were heaven and earth.
I wasted time and shed pointless tears.

You weren't there for the past 10 years of my demonic years, nor knowing the stories of it.
Life changes me, you can't.

Last night, tears were our closure. At least from my end.
Adieu boy.

Lebaran is near

Ramadhan has gone by so fast!
Suddenly, lebaran only a week away. A meet-up i've been dreading to go is approaching. I speak none of it wishing he would forget.

Why do i dig my own grave? To think its Ramadhan's blessing is such a naive thought.

I wish time would slow down as my beating heart run faster. *sigh

SMS

Sms itu ga perlu ditungguin. Salah sendiri nomernya pake diilangin. Mau Sms juga ga bisa.

Nah, skrg gregetan salahin siapa hayo?

Curiosity killed the cat.
This cat says, meow.

Expelliarmus!

I need a wand by now.
To get rid of you from my thoughts.

Is it the curiousity playing mind-games on me?

Were you just teasing?
Does your words only meant dry?
If they do, they hurt.

It started off as games.
Now I'm the one being played.
Karma backfired.

Hey, kamu!
You really are a waste of my thoughts and skipped heartbeats!

Expelliarmus! Expelliarmus!! Be gone.
Sshoo sshoo

Less than sign numeral 3

This is WHY I love you!!!!!!! :((


Sent from my BlackBerry® smartphone from Sinyal Bagus XL, Nyambung Teruuusss...!

xoxo

Hey boy, I'm ignoring you just because he's around. I chose him, but still want you on the side.

xoxo

British Edward.

I met an Edward..

Waltzed into the glass door. Eurasian character, accentuate distinct British accent, but the eyes what gave him away as half Japanese. Slightly pompous personality. Very good looking. His skin is so pale white, but the eyes

He sat across my desk, I ignored.
Interesting character, but not my cuppa tea.
First impression wore off by continuing arrogant personality.

I had a feeling

Oh,

For 4 months the feeling grew.
I fell in love.
but fall out of it soon after.
Just because...

He's too precious if he's to be out of my life.
so he doesn't need to know anything else but..

:)

Say

"Say what you need to say
Have no fear for giving in
Have no fear for giving over"

Mr. John Mayer speaks those words.
In different interpretation, I gave in.

Following John's wise words, I've completely fallen into endless dark cave.

I'm a sick masochistic lioness.
Yeah, edward cullen is my brother. Ha!

May 2010

I've made peace with my heart.

Sort of.

A tweety byrd came by with a note

"Would it be out of line, if I said:

I miss you."

Belitung, Aku dan Dia

Hai

Ijinkan aku sedikit melankoli ya..








Dengan beralaskan pasir, di pulau ini aku bertatap muka dengan air.
Langit membelakkan matanya, mengintai gerak-gerik kita.

Di puncak pulau pasir ini Aku,
Meningggalkan nama.
Biar lah, air menghapusnya --- Hilang
seperti melalap pulau disaat malam tiba.
Esok mentari mengintipnya dari Timur,
Jejakmu pun lenyap.
Putih, bersih, sendiri --- kembali semula.

dan hanya bisu Angin yang akan pernah membaca namanya.



~Belitung, Jan 2010

Caveman by Fira Basuki

Fira Basuki made hashtag tweets about a caveman and pria tikungan.

I didn't follow them from the beginning so not really know what they're about.
But one of her caveman posting tickled me.

It says like this:
@FiraBasuki: Maksud km apa #caveman? Abiz ketemu trus masuk goa gak keluar2 lg? Mau penampakan aja?

If caveman is to refer a real man.
Then ms. B, your caveman is somewhat similar to my caveman.

A really annoying hard to predict person.

Thank you fira basuki.
Your tweet just exactly define that person suddenly M.I.A.

As easy as 1, 2, 3
Right-click > delete this person > are you sure you want to delete? > YES.

Overwhelmed

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAhhhhhhhhhh !!!!!!!

Saying it all out doesn't tone down the excitement. I'm flabbergasted! Mounted emotions dwell inside. Eyes closed, flashes of visuals are to be seen as if eyes were wide-open. They connect with delight heart. Screaming. Screaming! of silent shouts. Emotionally tamed.

"You need only to understand that it is not necessary to understand but only to enjoy"

Cookie, you should know that to understand and to feel are two very different things. They, sometimes, contradict and debate.

Neither is now winning.

chances

gue suka gregetan liat orang yang dikasi opportunity menguntungkan dan positif tapi dia dengan gampangnya melepaskan.
gue juga suka gregetan liat orang yang selalu gak enakan. and i mean, SELALU.


maybe i'm being too pushy? I mean, who am i anyway to tell anyone what to do?!


such a waste.
to loose good opportunity when it's already for you to take!

ughh gregetan!

I Don't Read You

I don't read you anymore.

when you've become too commercial to my taste.

your originality has been castrated by your capitalist mind.

I lost you when dollars has sit tight in your open arms.


I miss the honesty and the passion.
Your honesty and passion.